Member-only story
Ladders Make Terrible Shoes
They are not great snowshoes, either
Ladders make terrible shoes. I didn’t want to believe it, but I am willing to admit I was wrong.
Wearing ladders as shoes may be a good workout — my legs are as strong as steel girders now — but they are not conducive to getting anywhere on time. You can’t drive with ladder shoes on. You can’t take the subway, either. Or a cab. So you have to walk, which is fine. I like to walk. But walking has its own set of issues.
Walking while wearing ladders as shoes makes it hard to turn left or right. Even walking straight can be problematic. I tried to cross a busy boulevard when suddenly, I couldn’t move. I looked down, and a car had stopped on one of my ladders. I shouted, “Are you blind, Mac? Get off my shoes!”
[Looking back, perhaps New York City wasn’t the best test city.]
Apparently, Mac was not too keen on running over my ladder to begin with. Who knew Corvette tires cost that much? So, raising my voice was probably not the wisest reaction. Well, Mac decided to jump out of his Corvette — which was rather easy since it was a convertible — and see how well his fist would fit against my nose.
I thought about running, but you know, ladder shoes. Then I thought about slipping out of the ladders and running barefoot…
