Member-only story

Humor

My Life As A Hacker

If you want to dance with danger, you better be a better dancer than me

Mark Starlin
6 min readFeb 14, 2021

--

I watch TV. I check social media. I know what’s cool. So when I started comparing my humdrum life as a rotary phone repairman to the unimaginably cool lives of hackers, I knew a career change was in order.

But how does someone become a hacker?

My first thought was, I’ll become a cat. Cats hack up hairballs all the time. Then I remembered that I have never really enjoyed washing myself with my tongue.

I could take up smoking, was my next thought. Smokers hack a lot also. But, it’s pretty gross. And not in a cool gross way like burping The National Anthem. Just gross. And that raspy, gravelly smoker’s voice would not enhance my naturally nasally voice at all. So I scratched that idea also.

I considered catching a cold or the flu. But that is not a long-term career solution.

No, I needed to do it the hard way. I would have to learn to code.

I went to the bookstore that remains, and I found a book called Anyone Can Code. Unfortunately, it was about heart attacks. Oops. Then I saw Coding Is Easy. I bought it.

--

--

Mark Starlin
Mark Starlin

Written by Mark Starlin

Old bones. Young heart. Uniquely arranged words.

Responses (2)