Not Compatible?


Mark Starlin
2 min readMar 14, 2024


When Craig’s wife of 35 years died of cancer, he initially had no interest in other women. But after two years, he began to consider dating. At the encouragement of his daughter, Beth, he tried a dating app. She walked him through the process.

“Why are there so many questions about my interests?” Craig asked.

“They want to match you with someone compatible,” Beth replied.

“Your mother and I had almost nothing in common. We shared similar views on the big things like religion and children, but that was about all. We were very different people.”

“Don’t you want to meet someone who likes the same things as you?”

“Sure. They’re called friends. In a relationship, I want someone who will introduce me to new things and make me think. Someone interesting. Not someone just like me. A football team made up of only quarterbacks will never win a game. Having a partner with different strengths makes a relationship stronger.”

“Well, I can’t argue with that. But that’s not how these apps work.”

Craig looked at the app again. “I appreciate your concern and help, but I am going to pass on the dating app. If I am going to meet someone, it will be the old-fashioned way, in person, face to face, by chance or divine intervention.”

Beth sighed. “Alright, Dad. If you change your mind, I am always happy to help.” She knew he wouldn’t.

“Thank you, sweetheart. I love you.”

“I love you too, Dad.”

The next day, Craig got up early, put on some nice clothes, and headed out the door.