The Effects Of Cable News On The Brain

The Scientific Study Results

Three groups of scientists recently did a study on the effects of cable news on the brain.

After watching cable news for 1000 hours, the first group of scientists became so paranoid and depressed they wouldn’t release their results.

The second group couldn’t remember what the study was about and blamed the first group for their memory loss.

The third group said, “Pancakes are the main cause of paranoia and depression. We ate pancakes this morning while watching cable news, and now we are paranoid and depressed. Pancakes must be the cause. The proof is indisputable.”

Who wants to join me for some pancakes?

Old bones. Young heart. Focusing on a wide variety of creativity. @markstarlin

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