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History Is Wrong! • The First Thanksgiving
by Sterling Datebook
Many people think history is accurate. Wrong! Most history books were written by people who weren’t there. Writing about the past like they know what they’re talking about. Wrong! In my constant quest to get the real story, I have acquired a time machine (don’t ask how.) I will use it to travel back in time (going forward is impossible, it’s stuck in reverse) and uncover the truth about history. Shall we begin?
There are many misconceptions about the first Thanksgiving.
Perhaps you think they had pumpkin pies? Wrong! The pilgrims had precious little sugar and no butter or flour on that first Thanksgiving. And no oven to cook pies in. One pilgrim child did make a mud pie; however, it remained untouched.
Perhaps you think it took place on the last Thursday in November? Wrong! It was actually a three-day feast to celebrate their first successful harvest. The history books say the exact date is not known. Wrong! It was October 22–24, 1621.
I arrived in late September, and my phone battery died out long before the actual event happened. Unable to watch any more downloaded episodes of Dr. Who, I used my free time to insert myself into the group masquerading as a Canadian fur trapper. I simply added “eh?” to the end of many of my sentences and…
